Is Settling Really So Bad?

Should You Never Settle?

We’ve all heard the words ‘never settle’, and while I agree there is truth to that I also think there is a part of us that craves settling. There’s nuance to everything in life, and settling is no different. I think there are times where settling is absolutely necessary and also instances where we shouldn’t settle.

When Should We Settle?

I’m going to use myself as an example here. Over the past few years I’ve been all over the place with my living situation never really having a place that felt totally like home. I’m also about to embark on a digital nomad journey so I know I won’t have a home base for the next little while either. As much as I love being on the go and exploring there is also a big part of me that loves to feel settled. I love to have a cozy space, my own little sanctuary and that safety feeling of a home. Little things like putting up art on the wall because you know you’re going to be settle in on place for a long time, or putting personal touches and loving energy in your space.

It’s interesting because the less I’ve felt like I had my own space the more I crave the settled energy. There was a long time where I never wanted to settle in my location but I’m coming to a place in my life where I know I’m almost ready for it and I’m excited to embrace that chapter when it comes.

When Should We Not Settle?

Knowing when to settle and when not to settle really comes down to knowing yourself, having strong boundaries and reflecting on what makes you feel your best. This could come down to where you live, your relationships, your career, your hobbies or anything else. Being able to tap into how you feel in all of these areas of your life will guide you into the right decisions. Do you feel expansive and excited about making changes and trying something new? Or do you feel that instinct in your gut, that contraction that doesn’t feel good. Also note, you can still feel expansive about something but nervous at the same time.

Ultimately only you know what truly makes you happy. There’s many instances in my own life where I could have settled in situations that weren’t the best for me but I always had that little voice or gut feelings that ultimately it wasn’t right for me. So I continued on my journey to finding what was. Sometimes you need to try a bunch of things in order to find where you fit.

The Nuance of it All.

Life is all about balance. What are you willing to settle on and what are you not willing to settle on? That’s for you to decide really. 

E xx

 
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Being Seduced by Trying New Things & Redefining Failure w/ B. Jeffrey Madoff